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Runner Confessions - Stay Humble, Friends

Runner Confessions

(Hold on to your camelbacks… here we go!)

I thought it would be interesting to ask runners in our community to share some experiences they have had while pounding the pavement over the years. I have to admit, I was ill prepared for the vast range of responses. I’m titling this first edition of Runner Confessions, (as there will definitely be more), “Stay Humble, Friends.” Enjoy…

Earlier in my running career, I was running by the Summerfest grounds on the first day of the festival. There were swarms of people making their way towards the front gates. Trying to look all “bad-ass” I picked up my speed and exaggerated my form which led to me tripping on a crack in the concrete. I hit with such force that I skidded forward, depants-ing myself. I had scrapes on my knees, hip bones, and palms. A few festival goers stopped to ask if I was okay and, while holding back their smirks, handed me water to wash the blood off. Needless to say, I am a more humble runner as a result of the experience… and almost never run in front of large groups of people. Female, 41

A five mile run wearing two different shoes - one blue and one black. I know it’s hard to believe but when I started this run it was dark and rainy at about 5:15am. I didn’t even notice until my wife saw me in the driveway post run. Male, 55

After a half marathon race, I realized the mocha-flavored GU I had in the back zipper pocket of my light blue shorts had leaked. From behind- it absolutely did NOT look like a mocha-flavored GU I had in the back pocket of my light blue shorts had leaked. Get my drift? Female, 34

I injured my ankle on a marathon training run because I got twisted up in the shirt I was trying to take off mid-stride. - Male, 44

Every summer we go up north to my wife’s family cabin. It’s a great place to get a good run in because it is extremely wooded and traffic is light on some fun winding and hilly roads. I took off bright and early in the morning for 7 miles. At the halfway point I realized I had a problem - a BIG problem. I had to go… bad. This was not just a simple “pee in the woods” moment. I had no choice so I made my way into the woods and became one with nature. I proceeded to have the most uncomfortable run of my life heading back to the cabin. Hours later I understood my trip would have some lasting effects. My wife counted over 22 mosquito bites, which remained for DAYS, on my behind. It was a very itchy vacation. Male, 28

I injured my foot at the starting line of a race but didn’t stop running because I didn’t want to get a DNF (Did Not Finish). It turns out I ran that whole race on a broken foot. In my defense, I thought it was just “tweaked” and I’d like to think I would have stopped had I known it was broken… but I probably wouldn’t have. Female, 46

There was one time I ran in 90 degree heat and peed myself. I poured the water I had with me on the front of my shorts to make it look like “water,” then proceeded to pee myself while running the remaining 3 miles home. It was later that I was told this was a sign of heat stroke! Now I am more cautious when I feel the urge. Female, 42

Last winter by the lakefront, I ran in subzero weather, like I usually do. I came around a turn and hit some ice, my feet sliding out from underneath me. I landed on some ice-covered grass and dirt next to the concrete path. My knee, hip and elbow actually broke through the ice and believe it or not, it turned out the ice was covering up a giant mud puddle. I got up, covered in mud and ran home. At home, my husband couldn’t stop laughing at how ridiculous I looked covered in mud in subzero temps! Female, 38

I completed an entire speed workout on the treadmill at a popular gym before realizing I was wearing my shorts inside out. Female, 35

Karen Berenson